Surgery Day...

It has been quite a while since I personally wrote in this blog...in fact, the last entry I scribed was during the first few weeks of Madi's life while in the NICU...

Pins and needles. NO. More like, spikes and knives...

Wow, the day that we have been anticipating (in both a positive and fearful way) has arrived. So, this morning/today has quite literally been the hardest day of my life thus far-hands down. The starvation, sleep deprivation, and physical challenges of Ranger school, two combat tours in Iraq, being wounded, losing comrades, being broken up with Jenn for 3 days in college :) , ALL the emotional and mental challenges of life up to this point...none can compare to watching your 6 1/2 month old daughter being carried off into the OR for open heart surgery. I was nothing but helpless at that point...

Utterly helpless...

A moment in time that will never escape the memory of my heart played out like this: after Jenn and I allowed one of the OR nurses to take Madi from us and start heading to the OR area, we both noticed that just before Madi disappeared around a corner, she was straining over her shoulder to look around the nurse and catch one last glimpse of mommy and daddy-tearing up and trying to maintain composure in the hallway. That event yanked at my heart...almost right out of my chest.

As a father, the emotional challenges of this event revolve around the premise that I am completely powerless to protect her...to shield her from the pain and discomfort that this lifetime is sure to produce. Because the procedure is a MUST, to enhance the quality of her health and life, what else can I do but humbly deal with the emotional shackles to which I am currently bound...?

At this very moment, we are sitting in the surgery waiting room, whispering our prayers and making every effort to keep thoughts positive and our minds elsewhere. Through the windows we can see a clear and sunny day; blue skies and green trees litter the picturesque background...a scene that has become a trademark for the changing season in WA. Today IS a beautiful day, indeed. Madi is currently being operated on to repair and strengthen her heart, and, we have endured yet another emotional hurdle that will strengthen our spirits and hearts as well. Life is a beautiful thing...and even more beautiful when you take the time to look at it through the eyes of your own child. All the introspection in the world cannot help you fully appreciate the fragility and the power of life better than the eyes of your flesh and blood.

Yes, Jenn and I are scared. Unbelievably scared. But we will get through this together...and more importantly, little Miss Madi will get through this. We will continue to keep you all in the loop with how things turn out...

Thank you for all the blessings, prayers and well wishes from our family and friends. Bless you all. Also, a special thanks to Grandma and Grandpa Lichtenberger for making the trip up from Sacramento and spending time with us at the hospital. Also, thanks to Beth (a great friend and Madi's Godmother) for taking the time to keep us company at the hospital and for always managing to help keep a smile on our faces. AND, a huge thanks from me to the Triple Play Stinger family. Thank you players and parents! The gift bag that Joy dropped off was VERY thoughtful and much appreciated. Thank you so much for your consideration as well as your individual places in my life. It really means a lot...

All Our Love, Dave, Jenn & Madi